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Poem No. 113

blacknessonseapoet

POEM TITLE The Lobster Pot


POEM The Lobster Pot

Ower the river Forth

whaur humble men an galloots

mixed in sordid hostelries and drinking dens,

oyster-cellars and ale-hooses, wi punch and porter

whaur fire stokers and coffin makers,

judges and toon guards

mingled wi the detritus o society

they flung theirsels aboot jigging an dancing

in the company o the fairer sex –

‘To see mony bosoms bare,

an sic huge puddins I’ the hair

an Some o them wi naethin mair

Upo their tete

Yea, some wi mutches that micht scare

Craws frae their meat,’ writes


Ferguson the poet who dreams o

the south shores of the Firth of Forth

far away frae the stench o Auld Reekie

to tak sanctuary in Blackness on Sea

there he micht listen to a clarsach being stroked

by the gentle fingers of a shepherd’s wife

and eat a bellyful o the finest succulent pandours or even lobster


Wha wid dare pit an oil refinery

sae naur, across the firth

Wha wid dare dae sic a thing?

it taints the beauty o the coast -

a sicht that poisons the skies and kills the views

fi Culross to Blackness and beyond


sic a contrast to that michty glowering fortress Blackness Castle,

atop a knoll of jagged black rock, that has stood there for near on 600 years

'The ship that niver sailed’ they say – wi its pointed stem, square stern an tall mast

sits - braw, bold an solit on the inner firth coast

whar mony a lord an lady an even a Cardinal were impreesoned for years


An as for yon oil refinery

glaidly nae film be blighted wi sic a sicht

They can aye blot it oot


An lang syne

oan a simmers day, mebbe

ye micht hae been in the company

o the rich and famous

Connery and Reid and ithers

dined oot on caller oysters and lobster

till aw their bellies fu

slugging back the ale and porter

then liqors that fire the mooth

wi tongues that whip in an oot

they’d haver and claver

an stoat aboot the Lobster Pot

sic is the life o an actor


So, if you’re in the mood

for havering or clavering

dining in or dining oot

at the sittinery or the sitootery

ye micht don yer finest cloot


If yer luikin for the perfect place

to mingle wi auld freens

to eat the maist deleecious meat

to savour wi yer greens

whaur the caller fish is tasty and sea food hits the spot

they’ll aye mak ye very welcome at the glorious Lobster Pot

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